Ideally you can get through the vast majority of this list, if not get ready to change how you operate on a day to day basis.
1) You are Cynical: Don’t get us wrong it is not easy in America anymore but if you are cynical you will continue to fail. If you believe everyone is out there “to get something” from you that means this is what you yourself truly believe is the “true nature” of humans. Your Mind is stuck in a negative feedback loop. If you are negative about the helpfulness of others it more often than not means you are unwilling to help people yourself. Break this negative belief system. It is significantly harder to bring someone up than it is to attempt to drag someone down.
2) You Are Not Actionable: If you cannot work up the courage to cold email, cold phone call, walk up to a girl and say hello you don’t deserve anything. If you’re not failing you are losing. You need to fail, no failure no growth, no growth no improvement, no improvement no happiness, no happiness and you’re on a downward spiral. The harder you work the luckier you get.
3) You Believe You Are Important: No one cares about you. Repeat after me, no one cares about you. The only way someone will care about you is if you help them or you add value to their life in some way. The truth is in order to become important you must become of value at that point you can give back to people who will undoubtedly help you in the future as well.
4) You Don’t Take Risks: If you are 18 years old and you believe spending the $5K you have saved up in muni-bonds you don’t deserve to be rich. If you are young the most important business you must invest in is yourself. Build equity in your brain. A few extra thousand dollars investing in yourself to learn how to code, learn a language, read books will outweigh the $350 a year you earn by doing nothing. If you want to become rich with no risk, please leave this website because the truth is hard work and risk are the only ways to make money, if you believe in guaranteed success with no hard work or risk we know who you are.
5) You Complain: This is usually similar to cynicism but is even more apparent. Be honest with yourself if one of your close friends was asked in confidence under oath if you are optimistic or pessimistic what are they going to say? If you know in your heart the answer is pessimistic you need to change your life today. Do you know anyone or look up to anyone who is a captain complainer… All signs point to no.
6) You Vilify the Rich: The vast majority of rich men and women have created a business to offer a product or service that helps people. To say they did not earn it or inherited a trust fund is to quickly rationalize your own failures in life. Yes they do exist but to say that this is the “only way to get rich” is a complete and bold faced lie. Go and look up the latest millionaires and billionaires. If a 17 year old can build an iPhone application and sell it for $30M (looking at you Nick Aloisio) you’re simply making excuses if you think you can’t earn a measly $100K a year working hard.
7) You Are Stuck in the Past: While everyone else is working toward a bigger and brighter future by working 60+ hours a week, hitting the gym, eating healthy and talking to girls non-stop you’re ruminating about that one time back in high school where your team won the “league championships” and you got laid. See rule number 3, no one cares. If you’re trying to relive memories, we hope you are 80 and those memories are packed with stories of success.
8) You Overspend: The difference between frugality and minimalism is this, minimalism means you don’t need to be frugal if you don’t want to be. If you are worth $10M and you enjoy shopping at Walmart no one can say anything to you because you have the cash to buy other items. If you’re not saving any money and don’t have any money in the bank the joke is on you for buying that new iPhone when you receive less than 1,000 emails a day that need responses.
9) You Know it All: We only talk about finance and girls on this site and may do a small stint on lifting but that will be it. We are not going to give advice on cardiac surgeries, big law, consulting or running a Chinese food chain restaurant. If you attempt to comment on everything you will eventually have nothing. Find a niche market to become an expert in, do not attempt to be a scholar if you can barely send a simple and short email to deliver a point.
10) You Don’t Pave Your Own Path: Assuming that you do not meet any criteria in the above and you have had strong mentors in the past the last step is to make it on your own. You are likely already incredibly successful as you’ve developed unbreakable confidence The last step is a culmination of a successful past. You are now ready to make the final leap of faith down your own road to success. If you choose not to, you will regret it for the rest of your life. Pain today or regret tomorrow.
If you are at the tail end of this list that is good news. You know there are only two choices in life recover or quit. Most need to live through all 9 steps before making the last leap of faith. At that point you don’t care if you fail because you know with certainty you will recover.