The Definitive Guide to Doing the Opposite

In our year end blog review we explained that the best move on New Years Eve is to stay in. New Years Eve celebrations consist of nothing but the Junior Varsity crowd getting sloppy drunk at overpriced venues for $300 a head. It is a waste of time. This has been a consistent theme on this blog “do the opposite” and we’re going to go through a large number of examples below. From small to large.

Small Examples

Example 1 – Tipping at Restaurants: If you’re new in town and want to find a good date venue then you should try a few restaurants… Solo. Most people are too insecure to do this and will unlikely read past the sentence we just wrote. If you’ve passed that piece and are willing to do so… Here’s the trick. Tip before service. Everyone sits around waiting for the check to come to throw in their “double the tax” tip and don’t even think about trying to have an “image” at the restaurant. Do the opposite. Throw down a 40% tip before you even start eating and joke with the waiter (note: not waitress since she will think you are hitting on her) that you are making sure he doesn’t blow you up when you bring dates in next time. He won’t know if you’re joking about this or if you’re using self-deprecating humor. You’ll show up with a date next time of course.

Example 2 – Greasing the Bouncer: If you know of a few popular venues that have the type of women you like, then it makes sense to develop an “image” at the club (notice a trend?). This will range from the bouncers to the bartenders to the actual club/bar owner. Here’s the trick. Grease the bouncer when you leave. Everyone else tries to grease the bouncer $20 just to get into the door with 2-3 other “bros” and ruin the club environment inside. Do not do this. If you are new in town, show up solo and have a good time. Develop rapport with the door guy a couple times during the night on small breaks chatting with him and other girls in the area. When the night is winding down tell him it was great to meet him (use his name of course) and slip him some cash on your way into a cab/uber.

Example 3 – Paying Cash: This is an obvious one to the long-term readers of this blog. If you’re running around trying to pay for bar/dinner tabs with credit cards to earn 1-2% reward dollar points you’re losing out big time. The biggest error when it comes to nighttime fun is losing momentum. When you pay with credit cards you’re doing just that… stopping the flow. There is nothing worse than running your newly improved game and watching the bartender/waiter fiddle around for 10-15 minutes trying to find your card mixed in with the masses. Not to mention… You can’t even establish that you’re a solid tipper. Waiting in the queue for the next round of drinks is a foolish move.

Example 4 – Maximizing Your Looks: Most guys think that it is not manly to evaluate your looks. These are the same people you’ll see wearing crew neck T-shirts and Air Jordans out in public. Their loss. You don’t have to dress to kill 24/7/365 since you may be bogged down with work and staying in for the night. But. If you’re going to try and meet people you need to dress to impress. In addition, it would be smart to learn some basics around photography. Take a look at the video below:

Now you don’t have to watch four hundred videos like this but do some basic searches on YouTube and find a set of 10-15 tips to improve your looks. This can include basic photography like the video above (simply search for headshot photos for men) or it can include style of dress (just search for colors for men by skin tone). When people see photos of you it’s nice to know that you’re looking slightly better due to 30 minutes of basic research. Besides, any girl you date is going to show your photo to her girlfriends and say “do you think he’s cute?”. If you don’t believe this then why is Tinder such a popular dating app? Enough said.

Example 5 – Showing Up Early: Under no circumstances should you set up a meeting and show up late. This includes dates, interviews and meet-ups with friends. It is common advice that you should “make people wait” for your amazing presence. This is complete non-sense. If you show up early to any venue you’re going to have the first crack at impressing anyone in sight. Besides, if you’re willing to show up late to meet person X, you should just cancel the meeting. You don’t think they are important anyway.

Small Example Conclusions: Notice that all the “small examples of doing the opposite” pertain to basic social skills and dating/acquaintances. This is because the lowest item on the priority list is acquaintances and random women at the club. That said, it is also the easiest to fix. So, if you don’t believe anything on here, try the tricks above and you’ll see they work. 1) leave a nice tip before service and the waiter will remember you, 2) tip after you leave the club, the bouncer won’t forget you, 3) pay cash to make friends with the staff – notice all three of these will cost money but create valuable contacts, 4) evaluate your looks every year and 5) show up early or find someone else of value.

Intermediate Examples

Example 1 – Impress Only Those Who Matter: Most people try to please everyone. That is a recipe for disaster because most people are not worth impressing in the first place. Before you bother trying to build a relationship… do some basic background work and find out if they are worth the time. If they are worth the time, go all in.

Twitter is a great example of this because we have weirdos and losers who @ message us to explain they are “un-following” the advice from both the main blog and Twitter micro blog.

Who cares. If you want a clearer example of losers, just look at the garbage people who got upset by Mike’s “offensive tweets”.

In fact, every single time this happens our Twitter and blog followers grow because we lose the bad readers and obtain the good ones. A good problem to have. It is great to polarize people.

Example 2 – Consistently Cut Your Contacts Down: Part of the annual process of elimination is deleting useless contacts from your phone. This is done to prevent unnecessary emotional attachment to old friends. Just because someone has been your friend for 5-10 years does not mean they get a free pass to suddenly complain all day and waste your time. Most people believe that history is a good reason to keep a toxic friend. They are dead wrong.

As you get older and your friends go through ups and downs the ones that stand the test of time always ask the right questions to get back on their feet.

Average people are going to read the paragraphs above and think it means “When your friend is down you leave him!”. No.

When your friend is down you give him access to all the *tools* you have to get his ducks in a row. If he continues to spam you to “borrow money” (see give him money) then you need to re-evaluate the friendship. The long-term friends you have (15+ years) will end up going through bad years. Your job is to find ways to help them based on their unique skill-set. Finally, when you hit a rough spot (and you will) it is your job to communicate what your skills are so your friends can help you find a solid career down the line.

Example 3 – Buy Items for Yourself Only: Most people buy items to impress other people. This is another recipe for disaster. Everyone has interests (sports, cars, clothes, drinking, traveling etc.) however these interests should be yours and *yours only*. Go out and try hundreds of activities and find out which ones you actually enjoy. You’ll be surprised.

The vast majority of people *say* they don’t care about the opinions of other people. But. Look at what they *do*. If they have to consistently announce to the world that they do not care about the opinions of others… Then of course they care… A lot.

So do the opposite, do the opposite, do the opposite. If you are going to spend some money on a material item? Great, buy it for yourself only. If you are going to buy something for a friend? Great, don’t buy it because you are trying to coax them into something. Just give it to them and move on because it is what you wanted to do in the first place.

As we’ve stated numerous times in the past, money is to be spent on 1) making more money or 2) making you happier long-term. That is all.

Example 4 – Find *Legitimate* Mentors: For the first time in this post we had to put stars around a word in bold because it is extremely important. What is the difference between a legitimate and illegitimate mentor? Easy. He is investing in you. What does this mean? He invests real time into your success.

This does not mean he should be holding your hand through every single step of a process, instead it means that the mentor is actively engaged in your life.

Not a Mentor Example: Someone you listen to every single step of the way is not a mentor. That is you following the directions of someone in front of you. That only has value if you have no working knowledge of the topic. It does not have value long-term.

Mentor Example: A person that is constantly trying to improve will eventually hit a decision point. Instead of running with his instinct he calls up a few trusted mentors to gather ideas on what direction to go in. That is extremely different from someone simply saying “do X”.

In short? Everyone else wants a hand holding experience through everything in life. They want the answers in a “step-by-step” form at all times. You will never succeed this way. While it is great to have a general map or blueprint, no one is going to actually execute the steps for you.

Example 5 – Learn in Your 20s Earn in Your 30s: As you can see from the previous examples above, the intermediate examples surround friends and contacts. Generally, this is what most people in their 20s are trying to improve upon.

There is just one problem.

Most people believe that partying and chasing girls until 3 in the morning four nights a week is how you “meet new people”. They even go out and try to run “game” in packs of dudes on the weekend.. during the day! This is wrong. Think about the people you meet in these environments and you’ll realize that you’re clearly violating rule number 1 by not having a solid screening system. If they are not worth your time go to the tried and tested move to get rid of them: Smile, Nod and agree. After this, delete them from your contacts.

Finally, this does not mean that you should become a boring frugal monk, it means that you need to learn to have balance. In our view this is going out *twice* per week. Thursday and Saturday since Thursday will have younger more attractive women and Saturday is by far the easiest night to meet women. Again, no need to simply believe this model. Try it yourself and report back.

On that note, if you are still running around getting black out drunk then this one is for you…

Intermediate Example Conclusions: As you can see from above, doing the opposite is going to save you a lot of hassle in life. You’re not going to respond to ridiculous drunk messages from that “one really cool guy” at 2 in the morning every Saturday. You are going to be “true to yourself” – as cheesy as that sounds and find activities you personally enjoy. 1) Only impress solid people – winners in life, 2) cut down your contacts if you make a bad choice – you will make several, 3) buy material items that make you happy – not in anyway used to impress the masses, 4) find a couple of high quality people that are willing to invest time in you and 5) build skills in your twenties, not damaged livers and childish hookup stories. You will have enough sex and fun if you strike a balance.

Advanced Examples:

Example 1 – Who You Are Determines Your Net Worth: That is right. The masses believe that you have to do something in particular (see win the lottery) to get rich. This is pure nonsense. The best way to improve your net worth is to do the exact opposite of this and focus on You Inc.

We have mentioned You Inc. in the past and what this really means is you’re going to compare and build upon what you had last year. This is the only game you will play. How can you improve where you are, how fit you are, your knowledge base and your ability to succeed? Notice that comparing yourself to other people never comes into this equation. It never should.

To reiterate. Everyone else believes that “network = net worth”. While it is true, this equation will only frustrate you. Why? You will end up complaining that no one is interested in adding you to their “special network”. Here is what you can do instead. Re-read the underlined segment and compare yourself to last year. If you have more information on topics X, Y and Z… Then naturally… you’re going to move up the food chain. Similarly, if your contact list from year 1 is not the same as year 2… You did something right.

Notice. Your network will expand in proportion to how valuable you are as a person.

Example 2 – Money is Time: This is not a typo because again… Do the opposite! Everyone else believes that time is money. They misinterpret the phrase to mean the following: “if you do activity X you could have been doing activity Y which would make you money.” That misses the point entirely!

Money is Time.

It means that you should use money to buy people’s time. This can mean 1) hire someone and pay them an hourly wage or annual salary – no ownership!, 2) it can mean advertising since you are paying to capture the attention of people and 3) it can mean paying thousands of dollars to obtain face to face interaction with someone you need to meet.

Use money to buy people’s time. This will make you money if you sell a product/service that is legitimate. Who cares if you spend $60K/month in advertising fees if it returns $120K in profit? Not you.

Example 3 – Build Rich Alliances: Pretty funny. Everyone that saw this blog over two years ago believed that it would turn into some “resume review service” or something to compete with Wall Street Oasis. Absolutely not and never will. First we do not trade time for money and if we were going to build out a business like that the last thing you would want to do is build a reputation up on an established platform and stab them in the back. That is about the worst business decision to make.

Instead you build up a long-standing relationship and eventually you will both find a way to profit. That is a much smarter long-term model. Are we going to do anything now? Probably not, we are strapped for time. But. The point is that you should build alliances by delivering value to people you want to link up with later.

Funny that everyone “knew” it was going to be a Wall Street competitor. Of course they were wrong.

Example 4 – Go For Real Money: Everyone else tries to short cut the path to real money. No, real money is not “$250K per year” (something you can make at the age of 25 as a hedge fund associate) or some such non-sense. Real money is $1+ million per year or *at least * a one-time payout of $1M+.

Real money is made when you develop many many many contacts (adding value to the bottom line of these contacts) over a long long long period of time and pull the trigger on an *event*… or by creating a recurring subscription revenue stream. That is the reality because “getting rich slowly” is hilarious at best.

Example 5 – Live Well Below Your Means: We have talked about the difference between minimalism and frugality in broad strokes (will have an updated version shortly) but the point is that living below your means will allow you to take risks in the future. Lets assume that you are financially successful and have a liquid net worth of ~$1M by the time you are thirty. (As you know, this is our cutoff for giving any sort of financial advice, otherwise the person is not successful himself).

That $1M in liquid cash is going to give you cash flow of about $50K per year. If you are smart (see doing the opposite), you will now use all of your extra cash flow to invest aggressively in businesses and higher risk assets (private equity, venture debt, venture capital and others). Everyone else would go on a ridiculous spending spree, buying things they don’t need to impress people who don’t matter. If you don’t believe this, why are people who win the lottery always broke? Now you know.

To conclude, the biggest tipping point is as follows “cover your living expenses with investments as fast as possible”. The catch 22 of this whole process is that by the time you are able to cover your cash flow with your investments, your entire income stream comes from work you love doing! Another one of those odd nuances in life.

Advanced Example Conclusions: Clear as day, advanced levels of doing the opposite focus on money. 1) become someone instead of trying to “know someone”, 2) use money to buy people’s time, 3) build alliances, don’t try to back stab people for a few bucks, 4) go for real money if you’re going to build something and 5) live below your means to create options in the future.

Final Elite Tip to Do the Opposite

Lets say you have succeeded at all of the items above. You are going to be in shape, financially well off, sharp socially and you will have a rolodex of successful people at your finger tips (Ideally sexy women as well!).

So what is left? The last item left on the list is to continue developing new interests. Yes that is the cheesiest way to end this post but it is the reality. Many rich and financially successful people are boring. Seriously. Look around. You will see that they have odd social manners and become even more rigid as they age! Make sure that you combat this tendency by continuing to get outside of your comfort zone.

If you didn’t do something new today, this week or this month. Go do it now. Do it today.

WEALTH BUILDING RECOMMENDATION

Manage Your Finances In One Place: One of the best ways to become financially independent is by signing up with Personal Capital to track your finances for free. They are an award-winning online platform that aggregates all your financial accounts in one place so you can see where you can optimize your money, track your net worth, manage your cash flow, and analyze your portfolio for excess fees. 

They’re best two features are their Portfolio Fee Analyzer and their Retirement Planner. The Portfolio Fee Analyzer showed me how I was paying over $2,000 a year in portfolio fees I had no idea I was hemorrhaging! The Retirement Planner users your real input to run a sophisticated Monte Carlo Algorithm to ascertain whether your retirement is on track. Simply link up all your accounts, click Advisor Tools on the top, and then choose either Investment Checkup or Retirement Planner to get started.

Personal Capital Retirement Planner
Is your retirement on track? Click to sign up and find out.

There is no better online free financial tool than Personal Capital. The firm is run by Bill Harris, the ex-CEO of Intuit and Paypal. They’ve got some of the most trusted investors and partners, included USAA, America’s leading financial institution which first started serving our military families.

Updated for 2017 and beyond.

Comments

  1. L. Urker says

    Great tips. Even this article is an exercise in doing the opposite – seen so many other blogs where posts like these are ultimately a plug for some chintzy $9.99 ebook on “Life Hax” and here you are giving it away freely with no strings attached.

  2. Rob says

    Thank you for another excellent post. Why did you say that most people are insecure because they don’t go out alone? Do you consider it a good idea to go out alone to bars ,lounges, and night clubs?

    • Wall Street Playboys says

      Most people are too afraid to go out to a nightclub or a bar alone. Instead they think that it makes more sense to roll in packs of 3+ dudes. It is a sign of insecurity because you’re not willing to put yourself “out there” by yourself. Alone. “What would people think” is a insecure thought. The correct thought is “who cares what people think”.

      Do the opposite.

      Go by yourself and make a good impression and people will become much more curious about who you are. Particularly the staff.

      It is certainly a good idea to go out alone because you don’t have to worry about entertaining your friends.

  3. thank you. says

    Love this article. There are a couple of examples here that really ring bells for me.

    Last year (2014), I was able to secure the spot that will platform my career as an IB Analyst, and was also able to cut 20lbs of bodyweight while increasing my bench from being able to do 225×5 to 225×12.

    Two of the things that I really need to work on now, however, is cutting the contact list down to ‘real friends’ as well as meeting people/girls outside of bars. I definitely land a bit in the bucket of still partying too much which at the end of the day is adding nothing to my life.

    Thanks!

    • Wall Street Playboys says

      No one is perfect. Everyone goes through that phase where they drop too much money and drink too much alcohol at the bar or club.

      Don’t try to go cold turkey and become the boring guy no one wants to hang out with. Just ween off of it and find other things you would like to do. We don’t know what that is. Could be art, could be music, could be traveling. Just try something new instead of waking up with that 24 hour hangover!

  4. Rob says

    How can you become unforgettable to the women that you sleep with? How can you make people that you meet remember your name? I know a lot of people and I’m excellent remembering names however they never remember mine. I remember my 6 grade teacher who told me once always make sure people remember your name.

    • Wall Street Playboys says

      More of the same, blunt answers and the answer is always “do the opposite”.

      1) this question is stupid. Why do you care if she remembers you in the first place? If she doesn’t care to remember you then… good riddance. If you are fun, interesting and lead the way and she doesn’t want to be part of your life. Her loss, move on. Again a Catch 22 where if you don’t care what she thinks, she’ll like you more.

      2) Again do the opposite. When people meet other people they try to make themselves look important by talking about their accomplishments. News flash. No one cares about the accomplishments of other people. The only thing they care about is “is this guy going to make my life better or worse”. If you can’t make their life better then they shouldn’t care about your name.

    • Wall Street Playboys says

      Thanks. We still have changes to make, but it is not a top priority. Not being rude at all we just don’t have time to invest more than a few hours a week into the blog.

      Overall the feedback has been positive! Anytime you redesign there will be bugs. Let us know if you see any major ones!

  5. MarkyMark says

    Great posts boys, can see the obvious improvements to the design, content and posts. Starting off 2015 on fire

  6. MH says

    Great post, I really like how you included examples in each of the different tiers. Did a great job illustrating the pattern as you move up levels.

    I have one question about friend groups, and keep in mind that I am still in college so this may be something I am able to get away now but not post-graduation. I have two groups of friends – during the week, I hang out/eat/work with kids that are obviously going somewhere after graduation, but during the weekend I hang out with kids that aren’t squared away for their future professional lives but always are throwing/know where the best party is. Should I cut off the party group completely or is this current balance OK?

    • Wall Street Playboys says

      Killing it like a gang shoot out. You’re doing great!

      The answer of course, is to do the opposite of what your family and the masses would say.

      They would say to “stick with the professionals.”

      Do the opposite.

      Keep both. The second group will be great on Thursdays and Saturdays when you want to party. Just remember the college to career/business transition is one of the hardest moves you will ever make. Your professional friends are likely terrible with women and they will be frustrated when making “$150K” per year does not get them laid. Your party friends will have lots of trouble with money and will likely go through lots of ups and downs as they try to make it in the real world.

      So when the time comes, do not talk to your professional friends about the attractive and fun people you are meeting outside of work. And. Never mention how much money you are making to your fun friends.

      If anything try to help the fun people ***only when asked***. Extreme emphasis on only helping people who come to you.

  7. WC says

    Great post I wish I would have had this advice 10 year ago

    Married to early gain to much weight and walk away with 20gs in the whole now 36 what’s your suggestion

    • Wall Street Playboys says

      Same advice to you will be given to anyone else.

      You likely cannot switch careers so…

      Live in the cheapest possible location you can that supports your profession. Put some money away ($25K at least).

      Build out a scalable business.

      Work 80-100 hours per week.

  8. Joseph says

    Not trying to be a hater, but do you guys practice what you preach?

    In other words, you are presumably in your 20s or 30s. Do you have net worth of $1 million + at this point?

    You guys nonchalantly say that virtually anybody with solid work ethic and the right outlook can stack this kind of cash in 8 years or so.

    I think this type of success is in a different universe. In the world I live with, people my age (that are successful) are grinding hard through their 20s and worth practically nothing after paying off significant student loans with very unfavorable terms.

    Personally, I have busted ass through my 20s, earned good grades, and served in the military to pay for my schooling. Just now, in my late 20s I am starting to see positive returns. Granted, knowing what I know now, I would have done several things differently. I just quite frankly don’t think the type of success you are articulating is possible pre-30.

    Granted, if you are in the top 1% IQ and go to Harvard and study economics or finance, you’re on a solid path. For the vast majority of young people, though, I don’t see significant wealth potentially accumulating until your 30s.

    Anyway, I really like the blog. I appreciate what you guys put out there.

    • Johnny says

      I have had these thoughts in the past and I’ve come to the conclusion that this blog obviously isn’t written for people like you and me, at best we can try and snatch some insight where we can.

      I work in the tades and haven’t cracked 100k but I’ve stacked some cash and make moves where I can.

      Do I measure my success against these guys? Nope. Do I need their validation? Fuck no. Im on my path.. As are you. We really just owe it to our self’s to press it for all we can.

      • Wall Street Playboys says

        That is a great view. That said, in all sincerity, if the blog isn’t helping you then don’t read it as well.

        Our posts have changed direction materially where they will add DIRECT and actual value or they won’t be posted.

        If that is not happening the blog sucks and you shouldn’t read it.

      • Johnny says

        This blog has definitely added direct value to my life.

        Was just trying to communicate to Joseph that there’s no point in comparing yourself financially to those on wall st.

        Instead take what you can and apply it whenever you sniff an opportunity.

    • Wall Street Playboys says

      “I just quite frankly don’t think the type of success you are articulating is possible pre-30.”

      In short this is fine. We have stated in the past that this is the requirement to post on this blog at sometime ~9 months ago. Is this perfect math? No. If you are worth $500K at 25 or $1.0M at 32 it really does not matter. It is ball park and is about earnings trajectory.

      The problem is basically 3 fold.
      1) you’re comparing yourself to people who write here when it really isn’t fair to you (we even noted this in the post, never do this.) Not everyone can go onto Wall Street. That is a reality we mention several times and making $100K a year in the sands if that is your best option… it is nothing to be upset about. That is solid work.
      2. We have put compensation numbers on this blog several times. The earnings on Wall Street are not “normal” compared to the U.S. population. Again this is why you cannot compare. $150K really is the base + bonus of a typical analyst (22 years old). Associates make $240-290K or so (when you get promoted to VP it is about $350-375K). Even if you don’t make it to VP that means you have grossed about 1.25M already.. You can do the math if you reinvest aggressivley. There are frugality blogs where people amass $1M by 30 and don’t make anywhere near these numbers.
      3. Many of the people who write here work BEYOND Wall Street. We have mentioned income in passing that is 100% NOT related to Wall Street. You can figure out what that is, many reading here already have.
      4. If there is nothing of use here feel free to leave.

      The last bullet is not meant to be rude. If the info isn’t useful for you then it’s not a big deal, search out another blog to read. The goal here is to provide valuable content/information to young overambitious people. Again if it does not help you we don’t want you to waste your time reading the blog.

      Just one thing…

      Why are you earning your income solely from one job? There are hundreds, or even thousands of people who want to work on the oil sands that don’t have a clue how to get started. Why not solve that issue and make money from it? You won’t be trading time for money if you can.

      • Anonymous says

        I appreciate the detailed response. I wouldn’t be reading this blog if I didn’t find it insightful. I just was continuously taken aback by the salary figures you guys tossed around, trying to figure out who makes this kind of money. The most successful people I know start out around 150k and have mountains of debt from student loans to pay off before they can begin stacking cash.

        But the truth is that I don’t know anybody who works on Wall Street… so that would explain my obliviousness to this whole world of crazy money you guys write about.

        You’re right that this isn’t my world and there’s no point comparing myself to it. I like the mindset you guys have – that by itself is worth reading!

      • Wall Street Playboys says

        Guessing you’re the same person as Joshua above?

        If so see below and someone is already asking how you do what you do. How you got to where you are.

        There is a market right there.

  9. African Banker says

    Hey Guys,

    Just to reiterate, you guys are incredible. I stumbled upon this blog about June last year and am addicted to reading it daily.

    One quick question. When you say tip before service, how would you propose doing so? Giving him a tip when the waiter firsts gets to the table? I agree with the idea, I am just slightly confused on the logistics.

    • Wall Street Playboys says

      That will work fine. It’s going to be awkward at first if it’s your first time pulling this “stunt”.

      Just be socially aware. Don’t hand a random waiter money if you haven’t even established rapport.

      Part of life is art.

    • Wall Street Playboys says

      All comments with links in the comments are auto filtered to spam.

      If you want to post links you have to use the website feature in the comment box.

      We don’t have time to audit random links from strangers, but if you post good comments you’re welcome to promote any website you like.

  10. Jason says

    Oil sands? Can you please give more info about this and how much you can make? There’s not a lot of info on this out there.

  11. Conner says

    Thanks for clearing it up, I understand time is an issue. The link was in regards to the song you posted. When you have a few minutes, listen to Ill Mind 5 by Hospin if you haven’t before. It sums up the average guy in the nightclub.

    Will you be releasing any more posts regarding book recommendations of 2015? I’ve gone through all the books you’ve recommended and loved them. It probably won’t be a priority as there is already a post on this.

    Great post by the way.

  12. East Coast Month 7 says

    Like Jay-Z in 2002, this blog is a gift and a curse.

    The Gift:
    Guidance.

    The Curse:
    It’s like taking a blindfold off after 10 years, finally being exposed to the world again. Takes a lot to acclimate myself to the environment and learn the terrain. Realizing that I am responsible for becoming the person I see in myself is scary.

    So much work, hope it isn’t too late. Thanks again.

      • East Coast Month 7 says

        Was there ever a time where you felt unsure about the path you were taking? One thing I fight is being too old for the street or too far along in whatever path I’m trying to take.

        Think I’ve come along way with the help of “Rational Living” and others, but the thoughts still creep in from time to time.

        Any thoughts/suggestions?

      • Wall Street Playboys says

        There are no short cuts just keep putting in the work.

        Putting in work does not include reading redundant info and spending hours browsing the web.

        Do 2 things.

        1) everything possible to advance your main goal
        2) 10-20% effort on a plan B

        If you can look in the mirror and say you did your best. You’re going to feel fine later in life.

  13. Another Fan says

    Hey guys,

    This is my 1st comment here although been following you guys since a year.

    A quick feedback. I love this new template, it suits on my phone very well, though the font is too thin, not too comfortable on reading. Cheers guys.

  14. JustThoughts says

    Whilst I thoroughly enjoy your posts it’s clear there are no writers in their early 40s/50s here.

    To keep it short – as someone who has read every post on the site (literally) the prelimexamples are hyper superficial and lack culture.

    Your mind set is way wrong on a multitude of things relating to real life.

    You’ve clearly had great mentors/experience when it comes to 1. Building wealth in the finance industry at an appropriate age in life 2. Exercise – one of your posts was clearly great here too.

    But some of your writing smells of insecurity and lack of emotional development. Ironically I’ve me highly wealthy and successful individuals who are super insecure and petty it’s embarrassing.

    Nonetheless with your work ethic I’m sure you’ll eventually win here too.

      • JustThoughts says

        For sure.

        And you no ogligation to do this blog other than to create more winnners. Which is great.

        But it just emphasises to me in some areas of life it is easy to win. I’ve sat in a room with Senator level politicians and billionaires who still compare watches, wives etc. Millionaires who are insecure they never got a degree. It’s embarrassing.

        If everyone is motivated to a large extent by insecurity. Do the opposite.

        But this isn’t an emotional development and mind set blog.

        It’s about success and winning. So I’ll continue to read the posts.

        Thanks for the work.

  15. Rob says

    Most guys go out to a bar or nightclub and see a hot girl so they approach her and buy her a drink straight off the bat. How do you approach this situation correctly and do the opposite?

    • Wall Street Playboys says

      Wrong question again.

      You’ve missed the entire point. Most guys just buy a girl a drink to “pay for her time”.

      No.

      You buy drinks as a *reward* for a positive and established conversation. Never buy drinks if the girl(s) don’t like you. If you can’t tell the difference you’re miles behind already.

      Also, you don’t buy the drinks. The bartender sees what’s going on and gives you two of the “usual” on the house because you tip well above average people. Then you just pay him later because you are friends.

      If you are new to the place this is exactly why you show up early (point 5) to make sure you don’t have to wait in line to save you $10.

      Yes it is pricier but the percentage of your chances goes from 1% to 10% of her caring who you are.

      Do the math. Being cheap in social settings never pays off. If people think you are flashing money then you are also doing it wrong. That is why social skills is art not math.

      We really need to do a post on how to ask better questions. Will add to list.

      Not trying to be hard on you, we’ve answered all of these questions numerous times in the past and it is becoming tiresome to answer redundant questions every day.

  16. happyadvice says

    Avid reader of the blog.

    Sounds like a easy question but I really struggle with this.

    In your previous tweet you said happiness is in the thoughts not belongings.

    When does one truly get happy following your advice?

    I understand to only compare with myself and not others. But basically, everything you advocate on the blog is working and improving yourself, always getting better and never being satisfied. Starting a business or making more money, working out, staying fit, not wasting time, improving your game, chasing new girls, seeing how you can get better, etc. Do you eventually get to a point and just take it easy and enjoy life? Or does is this mentality always there. Personally, I’m a workaholic and always try to get better but after so many years it gets exhausting and the mind never rests.

    • Wall Street Playboys says

      You should always be happy.

      Happiness = knowing you’re better than you were yesterday

      Go get your first $500K or $1M or whatever it is that would make you never want to work again.

      Take a year off.

      You will be bored out of your mind.

      Hebpoint of this blog is the same.

      1) get money first becuase you don’t want stress
      2) do whatever you want
      3) you end up realizing you were happiest when you were constantly improving.

      How can you be unhappy when you are happiest working?

      Impossible.

      —-

      Actually this is… ANOTHER example of doing the opposite.

      Guys want to take a vacation for “life”

      Do the opposite.

      Build a life where life is the “vacation”

      Absolutley no one has fun staring at a wal for 24 hours a day!

  17. Rob says

    I just made a my new year’s resolution for 2015. I will go out and travel alone to meet females and have fun. After a year what would the benefits be of doing this? Would I become an introvert?

      • Wall Street Playboys says

        So he should use his peak years in both energy and stamina to pick up ugly chicks at hostels?

        Goes against everything on this blog.

        Put up the two biggest blocks first. Health. Money.

        After that go do whatever you want.

      • asasasassdaasdasasdsad says

        yup. If you don’t have game you can get to the top 10% of game within a year or two only going out twice or 3 times a week. No need to devote an entire year of earning time.

        The people who study pickup go down one of two paths
        a) get good game, end up teaching it and trading time for money. Not even at a good return, competition is beginning to crush the pickup industry. You can work for one of those companies and still be living in a shitty studio in your mid 30s.
        b) leverage the psychological strategies learned from game to business and living a kickass life. These are the guys that in their mid 30s run their own companies, live whereever, and have epic game. I’ve seen a guy get a bit of game, his confidence change, and next thing you know he quit his job and runs a company giving him $xx,xxx,xxx a year.

        Be the latter, not the former

    • asasasassdaasdasasdsad says

      other note:

      Fun needs a return. This is why drug addiction is ultimately bad for you, it gives you an initial high and after you have nothing.

      Combing fun with growth. Instead of going out with some retards picking up drunk hostel chicks, go out with someone you are networking with and trying to get in their circle. Give them your drunk hostel chick: get a guy laid, and you are in his good books. In this you can work your game and your network at the same time. 2x the return.

      As opposed to drinking with random people. you will likely never see again.

  18. Toprock says

    Mark Twain said it best:

    Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to reform (or pause and reflect).
    – Notebook, 1904

    When you set aside mere names & come down to realities, you find that we are ruled by a King just as other absolute monarchies are. His name is The Majority. He is mighty in bulk & strength … He rules by the right of possessing less money & less brains & more ignorance than the other competitor for the throne, The Minority. Ours is an Absolute Monarchy.
    – unsent letter to Bayard Taylor, June 10, 1878. Published in Mark Twain at Large by Arthur L. Scott

  19. says

    Great article! Been thinking about this phrase for almost everything in life these days and in college it’s so easy: “Everybody waking up at noon, wake up earlier”. “Everybody just partying on thursday? Get better and network/get an internship”

    Also reread the article about I’m a failure: Love the story!

    PS: Kinda annoyed with the fact that some people post stupid questions with my name. I guess I need a new one here. Do you guys know based on IP who is who?

  20. Sayers says

    Hey WSPBs,

    Great article. You have great, no-bull advice and your contrarian approach is refreshing.

    What are your thoughts on private banking? Not as prestigious as i-banking, but since PB is a sales job, I’ve heard that after a few years, you’re set if you can build up a good rolodex.

    Regards
    Sayers

  21. v says

    Understood.

    My parents have enough money to support me during this period. Understood however.

    Sounds like you aren’t against starting companies, just getting financially independent first. I’m going after millions. May as well start early.

    Thanks.

  22. Pavlo says

    Hey, great blog!

    I’m not in business or anything yet, but I take your advice and apply it to what I can. Currently an aerospace engineering student.

    I’ve got a question regarding time management and priorities.

    My days are usually classes 8-6, when I don’t, I tutor until 7 or 8. Weekends are usually free, but I end up doing homework. I hit the gym often and make time for my girl as well.

    I’ve got a hobby related to websites, and I’ve been doing it since I was like 14. About a year ago an idea struck me that didn’t seem like a waste of time. My entire break in December I spent building the site. Now I just need content. But…I can’t find time for that and it takes at least 2 hours to do it proper. Do I cut sleep? I’m at a loss here.

  23. Rob says

    How many hours do you guys sleep on average? what supplements do you recommend for joint pain? I love lifting weights especially heavy weight however I’m experiencing joint pain from doing heavy compound movements. What are your suggestions?

  24. womenadvice says

    35 years old guy in corporate finance at a bank. very successful career-wise but don’t know any women outside the office.

    gave up online dating bc the girls are ugly. tried your advice you wrote before to go out and approach during the day on the way to work and life, but just feel really nervous, fearful and socially awkward and cant’ approach.

    any advice? trying really hard to overcome this.

    • Recent graduate says

      You have to find your own style honestly. While there are many resources out there, they’re mostly formulas and lines for you to say. These might allow you to “trick” women into your life, but ultimately, it’s about learning how to keep one or a few if that’s your style.

      That being said, the absolute most effective resource that will change your mindset is a free ebook called ‘Book of Pook’. It’s not really a book, but rather a compilation of posts. Read it, practice it, observe it…as WSPB say.

      Other than that, trial and error is the way. Just remember, women scare you if you let them scare you. If you’re shy or awkward, speak less and learn how to talk non verbally. Once you learn the basics, you just need to work out, dress sharp and become interesting. Everything will come naturally.

    • Recent graduate says

      Well, of course there’s a law of attraction. That’s the reason why you and many other ambitious 20 to mid 30-yr-olds visit this site.

      But this isn’t going to help you in life. Young people don’t really need to learn “laws” and theories. We need experience and wisdom and the only way to obtain experience and wisdom is to do something (and learning from it), read books, and listening to successful people.

      • v says

        Well it exists. Because your RAS focuses on it.

        But if you sit on your ass nothing is going to happen. If you make your only purpose to make it happen… it might happen.

  25. Andrian says

    Guys, I am not trying to be a grammar nazi here, but it is self-deprecating and not self depreciating. I used to think that too.

  26. patty says

    All coworkers/”friendz”, going to get “beers” after work since its St. Patty’s day.

    Thought of this post.

  27. Padawan says

    This post was definitely mindset changing for me. Looking forward to tipping my waiter like a wallstreetplayboy. Keep up the good work

  28. Andy says

    Another small example: haircuts. I could get a haircut on the cheap, let’s say $15, at a basic barbershop. Instead, I spend much more to go to a decent-sized salon and get its owner to cut my hair. Why? (1) Exposure to clients via owner = good for my work =$. High-end service businesses are a (right kind of ) people magnet. People who go to a cheap place either don’t have money or have it but don’t want to spend it (both won’t spend). People who go to a salon/nicer place either have money or want to feel as if they do (both will spend). (2) Exposure to owner. Always useful. Example in my case: last haircut appointment the owner asked me to do some modelling gigs for her clothing line/stores, which should more than cover the cost of my haircuts for a year or two (or more). **Summary: by ponying up more cash up front, I will >make< money off of, in this case, haircuts.

  29. wolfinsheepsclothing says

    Went to high end restaurant solo Tipped before serving – result built rapport with waiter enjoying it more, he gave me a free cocktail card and mentioned that I shouldn’t tell anyone. The cocktail cost more than the tip itself.
    Went to another high end restaurant solo tipped before. Waitress is highly engaged in conversation and talking to me. Tipping before dramatically helps you get noticed and have an more interesting experience. Very good tip.

    Realized that some restaurants are tailored towards either to mainly women who wine and gossip or rich men (Not frugal men – Note similar to WSPB’s other post). High end restaurants are only at the city where rich men live (Hint: Place for Networking).

    Greasing the bouncer – Noticed bouncer I see out working on his own. Approached saying if he needed I would help out – building rapport. He gave me some money to purchase something across since he was unable to leave his post – He greatly appreciated it. No tipping involved but built rapport.

    Bought new phone only added people who mattered. If regular people are asking why I am not responding I will say my old phone died or say I will call them to arrange something in the future. Then I will *forget* to call them back.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.